Yesterday afternoon I posted a video of my husband’s proposal to me in preparation for our date last night. You see, it was our 3 year anniversary of the day that my Marine went in and asked my Daddy if he could go steady with me. Yes, we are straight outta the fifties, and yes my Dad did think he was a square. Now, in all seriousness my husband is a huge blessing for me. I have told people before that if God hadn’t given him to me, I might not be alive, or at the very least whole. He is a tremendous help for various reasons. But tonight, I’m gonna give you 10 reasons why dating my husband helps my depression.
(Our little date, Culvers and Christmas Lights at the park. Aren’t we ca-yoot)
1. I get dolled up.
- I love doing my hair and makeup. But once you get in a slump you stop. When I was at my worst place mentally, my therapist made me shower, do my hair and makeup, and put nice clothes on every day. When he gave me these instructions I. Was. Mad. I did not want to take the effort. But it helped me. Even though I did it and it was sheer aesthetics, there is something that gives you a little pick-me-up when you feel like you look nice. And when I go on a date with the husband, I look my best and I remember that I am a woman instead of an un-showered source of food for my baby. I get a confidence boost.
2. I leave the house.
- I’m a stay at home mom. If I leave the house it’s because I need to buy diapers… Or do laundry at my parents…. Or take the dog out because my husband hurt his foot… On a date I get to be out of the house and back into civilization. I talk to people. I force myself to be social and interact. A task that is difficult at times when depression tells me I can’t talk to anyone, but a task that is necessary to tell me that I SHOULD talk to people. I should go and see the world around me that God created.
3. My Man looks good FOR ME.
- If you know my husband you KNOW he has his own sense of style. Majorly. But he tries to look good for me, a reminder that he loves me and he wants to do something for me. A date provides an opportunity for my husband to go out of his way to make me happy, and I Appreciate it.
4. We treat ourselves.
- Last night we went to Culvers because we had a gift card. Enough said. (P.S. Culvers now offers gluten free buns!)
5. We relax.
- We can laugh and talk as loudly as we want without worrying about waking a baby up. And if you know my Marine, you know that not having to worry about his volume and just letting loose is kind of a big deal. Ear plugs may be required.
6. We leave the electronics out.
- Day-to-day it’s easy to spend way too much time looking at a screen instead of each other’s faces. But excessive screen time can effect relationships. I just found this post on Pinterest talking about this exact topic and thought it was great!
7. We hug more.
- Yeah. You heard me. A date provides lovey dovey opportunities for excessive hand-holding, hugs, dancing, and smooches. Yes I said dancing. And hugs provide stress-relief. Don’t believe me? Here‘s an article that talks about hugging and how it helps relationships and can provide heart healthy benefits.
8. I put my worries on hold.
- A date is a time where I FORCE myself to not worry or think about things that will stress me. I physically push them out of my mind. And that’s what’s nice about my Marine, is that he knows my anxieties. He knows if I feel that terror coming on he can squeeze my hand and tell me I am ok. When being around people scares me, my Marine has always been there to protect me. Always.
9. We talk.
- Ok, yes we talk every day, but a date requires heart-to-heart talking. My husband is my confidante, he calms my fears when I speak them to him, and on a date is when I can really talk to him because it’s when we re-charge and think about US.
10. He brings out characteristics in me I normally don’t have. And that’s a good thing.
- I think a lot of people were a tad perplexed when my husband and I originally started dating. We are beyond different. Like the-only-thing-we-have-in-common-is-Jesus-and-our-love-of-Disney-and-potatoes type of different. But my husband helped me. He taught me how to turn off my crippling empathy and to be a little more thick-skinned. He forces me to do things I want to do but don’t have the confidence for. He helps me with my self-value.
My Marine helps me so much. And even though we are married, I’m gonna keep dating him.
I am not a doctor or physician, but I consulted both before starting my journey. If you need help consult the professionals immediately! I have no training. The professionals do and they are there to help!